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All Things Footie | Thursday, August 18 | Jordan

First Weekend, England Weakened

It’s taken me some time, but I thought I should round up last weekend’s ‘action’. The inverted commas exist because I’ve never seen so many bloody goal-less draws on an opening day—I don’t buy that it was because teams were playing defensively and nervous on the opening day; Man City v West Brom for one was a thriller, but both sides’ lack of attacking promise was exposed by the dour scoreline.

Liverpool began this season as they ended the last, inconsistent and mostly unthreatening. Best team in Europe my arse. Sunderland were shocking, and while I’d be hesitant to make too bold a statement one week into the season: they’re going down faster than Paris Hilton in a hotel bathroom.

Talking of promoted sides, I was mightily impressed with West Ham. I rate Alan Pardew—I enjoyed watching his Reading side long before he moved to the Hammers—and I’ve always thought Nigel Reo-Coker was more than just a great name.

Aston Villa have lost a great player over the summer in Thomas Hitzelsperger (regular readers will remember my long-term admiration for the young German) but they’ve a promising young team, and while Eric Djemba-Djemba is never in a million years good enough to play regularly in a top three side, he could do a job at Villa later in the season. Their opponents on Saturday, Bolton Wanderers, are beginning to look as though some of the more random signings are beginning to settle into a side, though I fully expect Allardyce to introduce some Ghanaian prospect he signed from Grasshopper reserves into the team ahead of someone with pedigree by Christmas.

I’ll never get used to Chelsea being as lucky as they were on Saturday, comprehensively outplayed and out-thought by Wigan, grabbing a last second winner moments after Wigan squandered a clear cut opportunity is a sickener indeed. It’s fair to say that it’s the worst time of the season to play a team like Wigan, when they’re trying to impress, and a good time for a poor team to play an unfit top side. Watching Wigan last season in League 1, they looked the most accomplished team in that division that I’ve seen for years. That said, they do have Henri Camara, who could go down as the most relegated player in history should he jinx the Latics in the way he’s jinxed Wolves, Celtic and Southampton.

A big signing this week for Chelsea too. A big, pointless one. Michael Essien is a nice little player, he’s decent. He’s not better than Makalele, he’s not better than Lampard, and he cost £26m. Can you say ‘artificially inflated transfer market’? I tend to agree with John Collins.

Perhaps the most controversial incident of the weekend happened at Highbury, where for my money, Jenas deserved every bit of that red card for scything Gilberto down in an innocuous area of the pitch. For longer than I can remember I’ve been frustrated by the fact that red cards are bandied about for swearing, taking your shirt off to celebrate, a bit of pushing and shoving, or calling the ref a tw*t, while Roy Keane’s famous ‘career enders’ go largely unpunished. I’m glad that finally referees are clamping down on the kind of offence that really matters; the reckless, dangerous, stupid tackle by the frustrated player.

Sorry Jermaine, but while we’ve not seen carte-rouge given for this type of offence much (enough) in the last few seasons, by the (written and unwritten) laws of the game you had to go. I did enjoy the game as a whole though, Alexander Hleb looked very lively, and capable of entertaining the crowds, and I didn’t even notice Vieira wasn’t there such was the assurance of young Cesc Fabregas.

I didn’t watch the England game last night (truth be told, I forgot it was on, and Corrie was really good) but I’m not surprised. England are poor: Gerrard is the exact opposite of a big-game player, David James is a joke, Joe Cole is about half as good as the majority of people seem to think he is, and Sven Goran Eriksson is only marginally better than Glenn Hoddle and Kevin Keegan (not a compliment, incidentally). The less I say about Michael Owen and Jamie Carragher’s shitness, and Beckham’s past-it-ness, the better.

It’s a toss up between which manager I rate less actually, Eriksson or Graeme Souness. Either way, both England and Newcastle are doomed! Doomed I tells ya!

(32) Comment(s) | Permanent link to this article

# Posted by Anonymous Rogue at 1:49 PM
Most of England's players didn't act like they cared about winning. I say ditch the "stars" and get some no-names who are highly motivated.
# Posted by Anonymous Pete_AFC at 6:43 PM
Essien is most likely to either play alongside lampard in gudjohnnson's (sorry, can't spell!) place or be seen as a long term replacement for makelele, given that he's now 32 years old.

re: england. i keep hearing this talk about not playing gerrard and lampard in the same team, which i think is bollocks. they're by far the two best midfielder's in the country and all it needs is for one of them to drop back and play more defensively - probably gerrard - who, against your thoughts, is certainly a big game player.

just ask milan or germany.
# Posted by Anonymous beefy at 9:56 PM
I think if you take a close look at Jenas' tackle then you'll notice he actually took the ball before scything down Gilberto.
Maybe it was a bit wreckless coming from behind like that but its plain to see that he didn't go into the tackle to try and hurt Gilberto and I think it deserved a yellow a worst.
As for Newcastle having a bad season, not on the kind of display that they gave at Highbury even after the sending off.
Souness has bought some great players especially Emre who looked good against Arsenal but will absolutely decimate the lesser teams in the Premiership.
To be honest though I have my doubts about Souness as well and i'm still waiting to see if he can make that display a weekly occurance instead of yearly.
# Posted by Blogger Dave Ciskowski at 2:58 AM
I mostly agree with you, beefy -- Jenas didn't need a red.

However it looks like the refs are going to be harsh with reckless tackles, even without malicious intent. Which is how the rules read, anyway. "A tackle, which endangers the safety of an opponent, must be sanctioned as serious foul play." Doesn't mention the intent. Of course, an intentionally dangerous tackle would still get you red for violent conduct.

My partner in crime posted on the Essien question too. I'd let him speak for himself, but he's got a new daughter as of Monday so he's a bit busy at the moment.

Was it me, or did Ljungberg look faster than he's been in the past couple years? Not quite a pre-injury Freddie, but he did seem to have an extra half-step.
# Posted by Blogger Jordan at 9:09 AM
Beefy:

I applaud punishing potentially dangerous challenges regardless of intent. I think Jenas deserved to go for throwing both feet at an unwinnable ball -- which incidentally he was nowhere near, he went over teh top of it, but thats not the same as getting the ball.

Souness is the worst manager in the history of the league, he'll destroy Newcastle the same way he destroyed Liverpool and Blackburn. He's already managed to fall out with your only decent striker (bar the ageing Shearer) and sell him for peanuts, he's fallen out with your best midfielder and let him go (for free?) and he's about to offload Jenas (Jenas' "I'm not settled up north" translates as "I'm not comfortable with Souness").

Emre's a temper tantrum waiting to happen too.

The only positive thing he's done is bring in Boumsong and Babyaro, who may actually shore up the defence a little.

He nearly got you relegated last season -- how you can have *any* faith in him I don't know.
# Posted by Anonymous beefy at 11:45 PM
Maybe you should try watching the tackle again because i'm 100% sure that Jenas made contact with the ball before touching Gilberto.
I don't think its fair to judge Souness on last season though as he had a lot of re-building to do with the squad that Bobby Robson left him and so far he seems to have made some very good buys although I do agree that selling Bellamy was VERY stupid.
I don't think theres much point in getting rid of him now anyway because hes already set his plan in motion and another change of management would mean disaster for the club right now and, dare I say it, relegation.
# Posted by Blogger andyrupe at 4:38 PM
Jord you really need to see that tackle of Jenas without your Arsenal glasses on !! Regular readers will know that thats an impossible request, but seriously come on!

Jenas made the tackle with his left foot, (he clearly makes contact with the ball) and his right leg (which he has to put somewhere) catches the back of Gilberto. The tackle was fair, free kick maybe, booking would be harsh, Red? thats just a joke.

Gilberto dithered on the ball and then went down like a ponce when a tackle finally came. He should have had no complaints. We cant outlaw a tackle simply cause the guy whose caught in posession falls awkwardly.

Now Jord i'm expecting some load of rubbish about how those kind of challenges end peoples careers etc etc, but thats simply not true, Jenas made every effort to challenge with his left leg and put now force into his trailing right. Making challenges like that a red card just ruins games for everyone.
# Posted by Blogger Jordan at 12:13 AM
Take off your forest hat weston ;)
# Posted by Blogger andyrupe at 12:14 AM
Sadly Jenas no longer plays for Forest Jord, though i dont really feel his schooling and previous allegiances really affect my view of the tackle. I know he commited the most sacriligious of crimes by daring to challenge the 'new viera' but he did so fairly.

Football will become a very dull game if we see all tackles outlawed for fear of somebody getting injured.

Interestingly, Jenas himself was on the other end of good tackle ending in a red this week. Though it was quite a contrast to see the response of his team mates to that decision (Shearer in particular!), it would be nice to see Arsenal for once put out a team that doesnt pressure refs into booking and sending off opponents at every turn. Ha, no, what am i thinking, they may be able to change their style of play to win plaudits but theres a deeper reason why all teams fans hate arsenal and I have a feeling Highburys maroon army will maintain that, their greatest tradition, for many years to come!
# Posted by Blogger Dave Ciskowski at 12:49 AM
OK I can't let that last comment go by. The Gunners and Henry in particular were catching stick from the Arsenal faithful all week for being too conciliatory with Newcastle for Jenas getting sent off. If you think they were calling for Jermaine's head... then you must have seen a different game than everyone else.
# Posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 8:11 PM
"Gerrard is the exact opposite of a big-game player"

First: What, exactly, makes an early season friendly against Denmark a "big game"?

Second: Did you watch the European Cup Final?
# Posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 7:01 AM
There's a reason the Jenas tackle was down graded to a double yellow.

Simple as that really.
# Posted by Blogger Anthony at 9:10 PM
A good tackle is great to watch when it's done correctly but people want to see goals! If soccer was a fortune 500 company then scoring goals would be it's mission statement and Wenger would be the CEO!
The tackle made on Jenas was stupid. He came from behind and through the player. It definately deserved a card of some color.
# Posted by Blogger Anthony at 9:10 PM
A good tackle is great to watch when it's done correctly but people want to see goals! If soccer was a fortune 500 company then scoring goals would be it's mission statement and Wenger would be the CEO!
The tackle made on Jenas was stupid. He came from behind and through the player. It definately deserved a card of some color.
# Posted by Anonymous beefy at 9:46 PM
Are you trying to say teams should stop tackling arsenal and let them score all the time?
At the end of the day football is NOT a fortune 500 company and, believe it or not, other teams want to stop Arsenal from scoring goals. Amazing isn't it?
I have to agree with the point Dave made above though about Henry trying to persuade the ref not to give a red card. If you watch it you can see hes just as surprised as the Newcastle players are.
# Posted by Blogger Anthony at 10:53 PM
As I said a good tackle is great to watch, I'm not sure how you can take that as not wanting tackles in the game? As for other teams wanting to stop Arsenal from scoring yes that's true but Gilberto was facing his own goal when he was floored. Maybe he was planning on scoring deflection off Lehmanns head!
cheers!
# Posted by Anonymous Anonymous at 11:57 AM
"It’s a toss up between which manager I rate less actually, Eriksson or Graeme Souness."

I've read today that Madrid have accepted a record bid from Newcastle for Owen, now considering this will be more than £15 million i think this sways the above question as i'm sure only a few weeks ago Madrid were more than happy to take £10 Mill just to get rid.
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