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All Things Footie | Saturday, July 26 | Jordan

Are you ready?

I swear to God; If I see that sodding ‘advert’ for the new Premership season with Elton John again, I’ll throw the remote control out the window. No, hold on, then I wouln’t be able to turn it over. Pom pom girls, dancers in football shirts waving scarves in time with Elton John in a velor tracksuit. Everything that’s truly awful about football today. The big screen in the background tells the whole story — clip after clip of footballers celebrating goals and trophies; not one actual image of someone kicking a ball (apart from the Thierry Henry-a-like doing tricks on a podium). What’s happening to the beautiful game?

As you‘ve probably gathered by now, I’m back from my holiday. Italy was very hot … oh God that f*cking advert’s just come on, excuse me … I’m just going to stop watching Sky Sports News. Where was I? Ah, Italy, while I was there I decided to try and decipher some of the articles in Gazetta Della Sport with the help of my very rudimentary Italian language skills. The main story right now centers around Jaap Stam. Apparently bids of around €12m have been flying in from Inter and AC Milan, as well as Juventus. Looks like he’ll move too.

Another article that I thought was a great idea looked specifically at the ‘12th man’ in the squads of the big four (Roma, Inter, AC Milan and Juventus). Sometimes, the first man off the bench can have as much effect on a game as the 11 that (usually) start each match. A similar article for English clubs would be a lot more difficult, as it’s not immediately obvious what the starting line-up for our big five (Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester United and Newcastle — in alphabetical order to avoid arguments). I may have a look at it over the next few days and see if I can get something together.

I can’t remember a summer with this many mickey mouse ‘tournaments’ in Asia, America and various parts of Europe. The FA Premier League Asia Cup? What on Earth is that supposed to be? Birmingham, Chelsea, Malasia and Newcastle; random? Just a bit. The funniest thing is players like John Terry going on about how important it is to bring home the trophy. It’s making the news too! The World is going mad. Ohhhh, Stern John has scored two for Birmingham against Malasia, lets see some interviews with Stern and Robbie Savage, that’ll be interesting.

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10 Previous Articles

  1. Going … going …
  2. The bad, the good and Ronaldinho
  3. Shopping in Kensington
  4. Horse, Wolves …
  5. Close…
  6. Peas in a pod
  7. Still Nothing?
  8. A little respect
  9. Excitement mounting?
  10. Adios David!