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All Things Footie | Saturday, January 4 | Jordan

Do I not like that

The FA Cup; like. Live football on terrestrial TV; like. John Motson instead of John Champion; like. That bloody scouse ‘poet’ who the BBC insist on wheeling out to introduce match of the day and tell us about the ‘magic of the cup’ at this time every year; I do not like.

For the first time in years I (and I suspect a few others) saw two superb football matches in one day. Despite the one sided scoreline, I thought Harry Redknap's Portsmouth gave a really good account of themselves during their 4-1 defeat at Old Trafford. If an awful miss from Nigel Quashie and a disallowed goal had gone another way it could have been a very different story. David Beckham's freekick was absolutely breathtaking though, if you haven't seen it make an effort to.

Terrestrial TV gave us a treat this evening with Southampton demolishing Spurs 4-0 at St Marys; and this one was as one sided as it sounds. Southampton were fantastic. They've looked good all season and this was almost a culmination of their efforts so far, Anders Svensson and James Beattie in particular were superb. I don't know how James Beattie can be left out of next England squad, I really can't think of a better English centre forward — and not just on form (apart from maybe Alan Shearer).

It made me think too; seeing as Spurs season is now finished, why doesn't Steven Carr just get it over with and move to Arsenal now? He might even join Sol Campbell in the jump-a-postcode get-a-league-medal club…

At 3pm I wondered why on Earth Radio 5 had decided to concentrate on the Shrewsbury - Everton game, do you think they knew something we didn't?

Do you think I Need an Albanian Centre Half?

Just when football's getting a bit predictable — Lee Bowyer being a prat, Gerard Houllier moaning — the one and only Bobby Robson come out with this gem, when being asked about frantic agent activity now the transfer window's open;

‘I've been offered two defenders I've never even heard of, one plays in Italy and the other in Albania. Do you think I need an Albanian centre half? His agent obviously does.’

You can just hear the next line: ‘and the Italian fella's this bloke called Maldini?! who do they think I am, father Christmas?’

The statistics say that without fail, there's a 60% chance of a cup upset. With so many Premiership - Premiership matches I would have thought that this would be reduced a fair bit, but that won't stop all neutrals hoping for a giant to topple. I'm off to the pub in a couple of hours to hope that Portsmouth manage it, but the smart money's on Cardiff to beat Coventry at Ninian Park. You heard it here first.

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